Reveals

Over the last month I have gradually come out of the pregnancy closet.  The first one started with my extended family. 

At the beginning of December we always get together for a Christmas cookie exchange and I usually bake the sugar cookies and everyone decorates their own at the exchange.   So this year I also made and decorated some for everyone to enjoy while they decorate.  I cut out some cookies in the shape of little onesies and decorated them as Dr. Suses's Thing 1 & Thing 2.  I forgot to take pictures of them so I don't have any to show you :( but they were cute!

I was a little late getting tot he exchange so it wasn't quite how I planned it.  I wanted to put the two Things on top of everyone individual pile of sugars so when they came in and had a look around, they would see them.  But by the time I got there, there was already a few people there and they were all hanging out in the kitchen.  My mom and sister tried several times to get them to leave the kitchen so I could set up, but it was no use, someone always stayed behind!  So instead, I put two cookies each on several small plates that my mom had set out for appetizers, then covered them with a napkin and brought them over to the table 2 or three plates at a time so no one would notice.  I thought I was being weird so someone would notice, but no one did.

Once we were all seated, I waited a few minutes, but no one even looked at the small covered plates so my mom finally had to tell everyone that there were a couple of cookies already decorated to enjoy now under the napkin.  Once everyone saw the cookies, it took a few minutes for it to sink in and even then, people were a little nervous to say something in case it didn't mean what they thought.  They were kinda looking between me and the cookies so I smiles and did some jazz hands before my  Aunt tentatively asked "are you trying to tell us something?"

There was many congratulations and then when my mom said something about twins, it finally clicked what the cookies meant and there was a whole other round of congrats.  Everyone knew our journey, so there were a few tears from everyone and they were so happy for us.  My cousin started slowly growing red trying not to cry before finally breaking down.  I swear you could see the line of red rising from her chest, up her neck and over her face.

There was one Aunt missing from the cookie exchange so we called her on speaker right away and told her about the cookies.  She just kept saying "awe that's cute" and then I said "oh ya, and they are in the shape of little onseies." again, "Too cute!".  Then there was a long silence while I waited for her to get it before I just jumped in and said "This is taking forever, I'm pregnant with twins!" Again there was silence before she said congratulations in a shaky cracking voice (she was obviously crying).  It was bitter sweet telling her because she herself was infertile and adopted both of my cousins.

Eventually we all got settled into decorating sugar cookies.

For D's extended family, he really had no interest in doing a grand reveal to his extended family so instead I just signed all of our Christmas cards "Love Erin, Dave, Babies M & M, and Jak".  Thankfully the cards were delivered before his big family Christmas on the 22nd.  Some of them got it, but others were confused and wondered if Jak had puppies.  We were the first to arrive that day and I was a little surprised that his Aunt started talking to him about work before saying anything.  Apparently she wanted to wait until she could confirm with his mom before sticking her foot in her mouth if she misunderstood.  Once D's mom arrived and set everyone straight there was many congratulations.

I didn't realize I had made my reveals so complicated that it took so much thought, but apparently so.  I decided to take a different approach at work.  For a few weeks I conducted a social experiment where I stopped hiding my bump and waited to see if anyone would say anything.  Only one person asked my coworker M who lied and then promptly told me of the inquiry.  No one else dared ask.  Eventually, just before New Years, I told a few people at work and then instructed them to spread the word so I wouldn't have to tell anyone.  I really don't know how some of them can still not know, it's really pretty obvious now...

The picture in the bottom right corner is from this past weekend compared to the top left corner from October.

Double tired

6w5d

The last two weeks has been pretty busy and add to that my exhaustion, I haven't had any time to update.  I've been hitting the hay between 8:30 and 9:00 every night instead of my usual 10 or 11.

I left off two weeks ago requesting luck for my 3rd beta after my 2nd came back with a low number.  The 3rd beta was 2166!! Which is more than double the 2nd beta (899) and more than quadruple the first beta of 489.  I was so relieved.  It was a very tense week waiting for those results.

We told  D's parents last 2 weekends ago because they were going away and my parents last weekend because they were too busy the weekend before. We told both sets of parents the same way.

I made a couple of thank you cards because they had both significantly contributed financially to our IVF cycle. Inside the card I wrote a little not expressing our thanks and asked that they accept this gift as a token of our thanks. I gave them a picture frame that I had picked up a while ago on sale at Walmart. On the frame it said "Grand kids complete the circle of life" and inside I printed a sign, kinda like yellow diamond construction sign that said:

Baby Under Construction

Est. Completion: June 28, 2013

Pretty much everyone had the same reaction "Really???"

My Uncle G, who is staying at my parents house, was the first to get "Congratulations" out. My mom came over and gave me a hug and cried. For the rest of the night she said she couldn't concentrate on the conversation, all she could hear was "baby baby baby? Baby baby-baby baby. Baby." She tried to get my dad to get down the cradle that she has above the garage but I told her I didn't want anything until after Christmas. She is not allowed to do anything until after Christmas - including tell anyone! That is going to be hard for her.

 

H wasn't there when we told my parents but when she got there, my mom showed her the frame (with my permission) and H jumped on couch were D and I were sitting, in between us, and gave us each a big hug. Her dog was going a little crazy because he couldn't figure out why she was so excited and he kept trying to get to her by climbing over me.

It was almost the same with D's parents, his mom cried a little when she opened the frame. His sister kept asking "is this what I think it means? I dont' want to make any assumptions here." I told her to make assumptions and yes it means what you think it means. She went all red in the face and started crying too. They were having company over for dinner and they were expected any minute so I had to tell L "Ok, now get over it, they can't know!"

 

In other news, last Friday (6w0d), I woke up feeling short of breath.  I couldn't walk up my stairs without feeling winded and I couldn't speak a full sentence without taking a deep breath.  I called the FC first thing in the morning to let them know what I was feeling so they could reassure me that it was normal and not a sign of OHSS.  I had also been very bloated so I was concerned that my abdomen and lungs were full of fluid as a result of OHSS.  If this happens it has to be monitored very closely to make sure it does not need intervention.

 

D came with me to the clinic that afternoon and they did an ultrasound on my abdomen including up around my rib cage to check my lungs.  They didn't let us see anything but we met with one of the RE's right away.  She told me that I do not have OHSS and in fact, I am out of the woods at this point for developing it.  That would have been a good thing to know before we down there, it would have saved us a trip!  She said that the symptoms I was experiencing - the bloating and the shortness of breath - is a  result of the progesterone in my system.  Also, that those symptoms were probably exaggerated because the ultrasound tech could see two yolk sacks in there.

 

IT'S TWINS!!!!

 

It's still pretty early, so anything can still happen, but I feel like crap most days so I'm counting that as a good sign!

Ketchup

I don't have any updates of my own right now, but there are some things I really should catch up (get it, ketchup? Lame? ya, I know) about.

March 22, 2012

That was a big day.

First, my sister had her second surgery.  It was something she had been waiting for, for a long time.  She found out with only 6 days notice, so it happened pretty quickly.  The surgery went well, better than they had expected and she is healing well.  Two things sucked about the timing though.  First, it was the day before 'The Hunger Games' was released and she had been looking forward to it for ages.  Second, it was 7 days before her birthday which would mean that more than likely, she would be in the hospital for her birthday.  Which she was.  I sent some flowers and a balloon to her room and hoped that helped cheer her up.

Secondly, my Friend T gave birth to a baby boy!  Her water broke on Tuesday afternoon but she did not go into labour on her own.  24 hrs later, she was induced and another 20 hours after that he was born. 7lbs 14oz and cute as a button.  So far I've got to spend about half an hour with him and he was asleep the whole time.  For the first four days of his life he was unnamed, poor little guy... but they finally decided a very strong name.  I don't want to put it on here to protect their privacy, to give you a hint, his first name is the last name of a former president and always reminds me of Jim Carey in 'The Truman Show'.

Escape

I don't read.

Don't get me wrong, I can read... I just choose not to. I have never enjoyed it. Growing up, I was never good at it. It took me a long time to read a book, so when I did read it was always an assigned book for school, not something I was doing for pleasure.

I can still remember the first big adult novel I read as a 14yr old. I was camping with my Grandma and my cousin and just in case it rained, I took John Grisham's The Client. That was the first book I enjoyed reading, I even read it when it was sunny. After that, I would only read John Grisham novels, and it would take me months to finish one.

This habit continued until well into my university career. Actually, I had so much reading for school throughout University, that I didn't think about touching another novel until I graduated. That is, until the movie Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone came out. I went to see it with my sister and my best friend. We bought tickets in advance to the theater in my hometown; it was one of the old school theaters with the little red folding seats that gradually inclined toward the back of the theater. The theater had even blocked off a section of seats for people who had bought advanced tickets with metallic Christmas garland.

We felt special.

The HP release was a big deal to my sister and I went because my mom was paying for my ticket, I hadn't seen J in years and she was going to come, and being in university I hadn't seen a new movie in forever.The movie was great, and the company was even better. It got me intrigued to find out how much different the movie was to the book. I borrowed the book from my sister and figured since it was a children's book I would be able to read it quickly and easily when I got back to my dorm. I was right, it was quick and easy, and good too! It was too quick and easy and good... I wanted to read the others in the series so I borrowed the next two from my roommate. I had them done before I went home again and then borrowed the 4th from my sister. I was hooked!

I couldn't help but think that if I'd had a series of books this good when I was growing up I might have taken an interest in reading. But then again maybe not. I mean we did have some good children's authors when I was growing up; Beverly Cleary and Grodon Korman to name a few. But there was something about Harry Potter that had me hooked - me and the rest of the world!

I didn't even recognize my self when I was the one who prompted my sister to pre-order 5th and 6th book. And I have no idea who the crazy person was who went to an event at midnight in downtown G-town where the stores all changed their name to ones from the series and stayed open late to celebrate the release of the 7th and final book, and who was super excited to know that she was only 3rd in line... who was that?? I believe I was possessed.

Since then my love for books has only grown. Every time I go home, I steal books that my family has finished reading. When I find an author who's books I like have a running character, I try to read in order them from the beginning even though the stories aren't necessarily dependent on each other. It has only been since D moved out that it has become an issue. That's when I was introduced to the Twilight Saga.

D and I went to see New Moon in theaters shortly after it came out. The theater was packed with teenie-boppers that drove me nuts. I didn't really pay that much attention to the movie because the kids behind us were talking and being really cruel to each other all through out the movie. At work the following Monday I told my co-worker that I had seen the movie, she is a HUGE fan and hadn't seen it yet. She wanted to talk all about it and compare it to the book, but I had no insights for her since I had not read it. She told me that I should, I would love it.

I borrowed Twilight from her, read it and returned it in less than a week. Then she lent me New Moon on a Thursday and I finished it on Saturday. On Sunday I decided I couldn't wait till Monday to get the next one from her so I went out and bought Eclipse for my self. I finished it Monday night and started on Breaking Dawn which I finished in a day or two. And so began my sudden and intense love affair with books.

Since then, I have re-read all four books plus the first half of the unfinished fifth book; Midnight Sun. For Christmas, my sister in-law gave me two books; Something Borrowed and Something Blue by Emily Giffin. I have since read both of those. Yesterday went online to see if the local bookstore had the next two books in stock and decided that this affair could get expensive. Instead, I went to the local library and borrowed them. I finished half of one last night and had to force myself to put it down at 1:30am so that I could get up for work this morning.

If you total all that up, that's 4 Twilight-saga books times two, plus two more; that's 10 books in 1 month. It may not seem like a lot to some people, but for me, that's HUGE!

I don't even watch TV any more, I just come home and read. It's weird. I don't know who this person is that has taken over my body. Maybe it's just because my life is rather boring with out D at home so it feels better to delve into the life ofsomeone else for a while. I don't know. I like that it's a little more satisfying that watching something on TV, or even a movie, because I book can keep me captivated for a longer period of time which makes the time that D is away go by much faster.

I can't wait to go home...
and sit on the couch...
and read...
what's wrong with me???

Merry Christmas Future Baby

It's 2 days until Christmas 2009. This year has been particularly hard to get into the spirit of Christmas for a number of reasons.

The first is that your Dad took a job that requires him to live 3hrs away from me for 5 days a week - he only comes home on the weekends. That has left me quite sad and lonely, we have not been apart that much since the day we met.

Secondly, your Aunt H went back into the hospital on the 21st due to complications from her surgery she had in October. I may go down and visit her later today but I have to talk to my boss first.

And the last reason that it doesn't really feel like Christmas is because you are not here. Christmas is a time for children, it's magical. I can't wait to recreate the same magic for you that Grandma and Papa made for me when I was little. I have been trying to keep away from the displays of Christmas ornaments so that I don't linger over the Babies First Christmas ones.

I miss you terribly and I don't even know you yet. In fact, we haven't even started trying to conceive you yet. In my perfect world, you would be here by now... you would have cute little Christmas sleepers and your grandparents would spoil you to death in 2 days. But, the world is not perfect, and although my heart aches when I have to think about waiting for you any longer, it is the right thing to do.

Your Dad wants the world for you, and right now we can't give it to you. Your Dad has been very sick for the last couple of years and we have been working at getting him healthy enough that he can help look after you. There is also so much that he wants you to be able to do and experience in this world and for that reason, we are working on saving some money so that you can participate in anything you want to do. I am very hopeful that early in the new year we will be in a better position to start trying to make you.

In 2009 the world economy has been really bad and many, many people have lost their jobs, including your Grandpa, which is why your Dad had to work so far away. Everyone has high hopes that the recession is over and companies will start to hire new staff in the new year. Dad and I have our fingers and toes crossed that he can find a new job and come home.

We have decided that we will start to try and conceive you in February, hoping that he will find a job soon. Your Dad doesn't want to miss out on any part of your life, even if you are still inside me. He wants to be there for us through the morning sickness and weird food cravings. he wants to be able to run to the store for us at 3 am when I have a sudden craving ketchup chips or bubble-gum ice cream. It is with love in his heart that he is asking to wait and I am trying to oblige, but every month it gets harder and harder.

We both already love you so very much. Happy Christmas 2009 little one, hope to meet you in 2010.

Love,
Mom

Taking the first steps

So far in trying to prepare my self for the ultimate physical challenge of growing another human inside me I have started exercising on the treadmill, taking prenatal vitamins, charting, and I've read "The Mother of All Pregnancy Books". I've also been doing online reading at various blogs and other health resources like iparenting and webmd.

The one thing that many of these reqources have told be was to book a 'preconception' appointment with my physician. Everyone who reccommended this appointment had also been sure to mention that until recently, any Dr. would have looked at you like you had 6 heads if you had requested this type of visit, but that now it was the norm. I was a little skeptical to call and request a 'preconception' appointment, so I wasglad that I was over due for my annual physical. I figured that during that visit I could mention that we are planning a family and if he had any concerns they would be brought up then.

So that is exactly what I did, on Wednesday I went to the Dr's for my annual physical and PAP (tmi?). Anyways, we went over mine and family's medical histories and current midications and finally he asked if there was anything new that was concerning me.

"Well, in the new year, my husband and I would like to start trying to have a baby."

"What do you want from me? To tell you how it's done?"

So aparently it's not so common for people to go to their Dr. with only plans to become pregnant! The only advice he had for me was to start taking prenatals, which I have already started. I did convince him to run a check on my vaccinations just in case, so I guess something was accomplished during the visit.

Mass Exodus

Yesterday my sister was released from hospital! She is now at home and feeling much better every day. At home she is able to sleep through the night with a nurse in every few hours to take her vitals and her IV alarming at 4 am. The only downside is that the bed at home doesn't adjust which means that it's a little more difficult to sit up. Other than that, we are all happy that she is home.

Then this morning D was discharged from the hospital! While he hasn't been going every day for a while now, he has been going about every 5 days. This morning the nurses decided that they didn't need to see him at all any more. Excellent news! They sent him with some bandages that he can use change on his own. I hope that he won't have to keep a bandage on for long and that things can get back to normal.

Well, that's my good news for the weekend, hope yours is good too!

Are you there blog? It's me, Erin...

Dear Blog,

I know you have been feeling a little neglected lately. I have been off in my own world working hard at my job and not giving you the attention you deserve. The truth is, I have been quite reclusive from everything and everyone since the wedding. However, there has been a lot going on that I should probably write about because I always feel better when I get it out there and it's not all bottled up inside (which is my usual m.o. for dealing with shit).

1. The Wedding.

Only one word can sum it up... awesome! I had an absolute blast! There were a few hiccups through out the day, but I think I handled them well and I hope I wasn't anything that resembled a Bridezilla.

2. D's Health.

I started a post a little while back but was afraid to put it out to the world in case I jinxed his wonderful improvement. That's right, I think I might just about have back the man I fell in love with. While he only ended up being about 80% better at the time of the wedding, he is at about 95% now! There are still things that he will never be able to eat again, like onions, but his appetite and energy are finally back! He has stopped losing weight, and even gained some. At his 2nd Remicade infusion, he weighed 0.5lbs more than the first one; at the 3rd, he weighed even more. He goes for his 4th in a month and I hope that he is back up to his normal weight.

3. My Sister's Health.

She is sick. Very. Sick. She had her colon removed on Friday as a last resort attempt to get her life back. Unfortunately that means a good 6 weeks of recovery from this surgery, 6 months of living with a stoma and colostomy bag, and finally a 2nd surgery to create an internal bag and remove the stoma.

On Friday I stayed at work as long as I could but I wanted to be at the hospital when the surgeon came to speak to my parents. The surgery was scheduled for 9:30am, H went in at about 10:15 (I think); the surgery was to last approx. 4 hrs. When I showed up at 3 we still had not heard anything. The Dr. finally came out at 5pm, some 8 hrs later, and told us that they had to make the incision a little bigger than they had wanted, but the surgery went well and she was in recovery.

According to H recovery was bad, and since my mom wasn't back there to help, it just made it worse. When she woke up she said that she could hear them talking about a bigger incision and she threw up and started crying. It took a couple minutes, but when one of the nurses heard her crying they came back and talked to her and calmed her down. It must have been so scary for her to be back there without her family.

As they brought her to her room, one of the nurses came and got us from the waiting room and we all went up together. She seemed to be in good spirits for just coming out of surgery. She even managed to crack a joke about Dr.'s taking her ass away. That night was relatively uneventful because she was still on the epidural and therefore numb and pain free.

The next day, Saturday, they got her up and out of bed and sitting in a chair for a bit. When she went back to bed, she must have hit the epidural line, because she started to feel pain. A. Lot. Of. Pain. Since they hadn't planned to stop the epidural, they hadn't yet given her any other pain meds yet. From there, it seems to have spiraled downward. She was nauseous, in pain had a distended belly; they were even concerned that they would have to go back in at one point. Instead, they put a tube into her stomach and pumped out the excess bile. That seems to have helped out with the distention. They gave her morphine for the pain and some anti-nausea medication because they don't want her to throw up (that could cause damage to the stitches). Needless to say Saturday night was bad. My dad was with her until 2 am, and her fiancee stayed the night.

I don't have a whole lot of information about what happened after that. All I know is that they had her walking about 30 or 40 feet. I haven't had an update since.

4. Baby Fever.

It's back and stronger than ever. I found a new (to me) blog yesterday called "Baby Rabies; when it's more than a fever". So true. D and I have talked about it a bit since the wedding and I totally understand where he is coming from; now is not a logical time to start to try to have a baby. But there is nothing logical about wanting a baby! I mean really, when you think about, what is logical about wanting to do that to your self??? Hey I know, lets do something that will make me sick 24/7 for at least 3 months!! and I won't even be able to take anything for it" Ya, that sounds logical! And then, I can get really fat and uncomfortable for 6 months after that with symptoms that range from sausage toes to night sweats, from cramps to contraction, and totally stretch and permanently disfigure my body. Totally "logical". And the cherry on the top of this oh-so-appetizing-sundae? You guessed it! The worst pain anyone can ever feel in their life as a baby literally rips you apart as it enters the world that lasts for hours upon hours. Logical?? My ASS!


So that has been my last month in a nut shell. How have you been?

All my love,
Erin

It's like I try and do everything in one day...

On Saturday my mom, my sister and I met with the caterer at the museum and went through all of the details with him. They have a glass stand that I can use for the cupcakes (yes, we are having cupcakes! yummm!), so I don't have to worry about making one. He also is going to put lights and a swag at the head table at no charge. They are pretty much going to do all of the set up on the day of, we just have to drop everything off the day before or that morning. I also chose appetizers; sweet potato pancakes, bacon and cheese mini quiche, and firecracker shrimp. All 3 will be Crohn's and Colitis friendly so that my sister and D don't have to keep asking "what's in that?"

After that meeting, We met with the Photographers, and showed them around the museum. Then we went up to Georgetown to the Gallery and to the Park where we are having the photos done. After seeing all of the locations in one day, I think people will think that our wedding photos are staged! We have the Park, then on the way to the ceremony we are going to walk from the park to the gallery through downtown and take photo's on the way, then at the gallery, then at the museum... all such different backgrounds!

After meeting with the photographers we went to Waste Wise (a re-use center) and found some wide mouth mason jars that I can clean up and put some ribbon on and use for vases to hold our bouquets, and some picture frames that I am going to hinge together to make A-frame signs to direct people to the museum and gallery.

That night we all sat around going through old pictures for a picture display. 30 years of pictures... it was like I saw my life flash before my eyes!

Busy day. The weekend before last D and I went shopping for bands. His will be titanium, and mine will be white gold to match my ring.

I have another busy weekend planned this weekend. Hopefully shopping tomorrow with my aunt for the decorating stuff. And on the holiday Monday we are meeting with our bagpipe-playing officiant to go over the ceremony.

Unanswered

Why?

Why her?

Why him?

Why us?

Why now?

These are questions I ask my self daily. I suppose that this is where religion comes in for those who believe in God. Because it's a test, He has a plan for her, for him, for you, because He knows that you can handle it and come out on the other side a better stronger person because of it. It's times like this that I wish I wasn't so skeptical, that I could blindly accept a higher power, and believe that there was some method to this madness. But I can't. So I am left to wonder why, why her, why him, why us, why now?

Since January when my sister was released from hospital, she hasn't been getting any better and just maintaining the status quo. In the last 2 weeks however, she has gotten worse. She has had increased and bloody bathroom visits. Yesterday she saw her specialist, lets call her Dr. Poop. Dr. Poop has been her specialist since 2007 when she first went to McMaster. The last time she was in hospital, she wasn't responding to the prednisone, the salofalk, and now imuran and remicade. They have tried everything and are now out of options. The only thing left is surgery.

The good news is that surgery is the only known cure for Ulcerative Colitis (UC) and as such, we hope that this will be the cure she needs. The bad news is that it is major surgery which will remove her colon, a pretty useful organ. Yes people live without colons, and hopefully this will improve her quality of life, but there are major risk factors and still a lot of unknowns.

When diagnosed with UC, she was told that it was 'most likely' Colitis and not Crohn's Disease (CD). They couldn't be 100% sure because while the inflammation was restricted to her colon, indicative of UC, she also had other symptoms that are indicative of CD. So she was officially diagnosed with Crohn's Colitis. What does this mean? I don't know. I am worried that it means that she is at higher risk of having problems even after the surgery 'cure' like pouchitis, or that it will turn out to be CD and the inflammation will occur somewhere else.

A Colectomy is a two stage surgery. First, they remove the colon, and create a stoma on the abdomen where a colostomy bag will attach. She will have this bag for 3 months while her body adjusts and begins to heal. The second surgery will be to create an internal 'bag' or J-pouch so that she will not have to have the external colostomy bag for the rest of her life. This J-pouch is created out of her healthy small intestine. Pouchitis, as I mention earlier, is similar to UC except that it occurs in people who have had a colectomy, in their J-pouch. There is no cure for pouchitis.

I hope this is it. I hope this is the end.

It will still be a while before she can have the surgery, because she has to have a bunch of tests done and another scopy. Mom said it likely won't happen until after the wedding in September or October, then she will have a bag for 3 months before she can have the second surgery to create the J-pouch. That won't likely happen until the new year so that she is not in hospital or trying to recover from surgery over the holidays. This means that she will miss another 2 semesters of school as she will not be able to return until May of 2010, according to Dr. Poop.

I have no idea what this will do to her wedding plans. They set the date for August 2010 because they assumed that she would be done school at that point, now she won't be done until 2011. Also, if she is out of school, my parents don't know what do to about insurance since she will no longer be a student and therefore covered under my parents. crap. So again I ask...

Why?

Why her?

Why him?

Why us?

Why now?

Birthday-Harry-Potter-Wedding-Shower-Extravaganza!

Awesome Weekend. The best one I have had in a long long time. It started on Friday when I went to the movie theatre straight from work to get in line for Harry Potter. I knew it was going to be a packed theatre and I needed to get perfect seats. My Sister picked J up from the GO station and met me at the theatre after I was seated. In honour of J's birthday last week, I treated both of them to dinner and a movie. Dinner consisted of Hot Dogs and Berttie Botts Every Flavour Beans aka Jelly Belly's.


Harry Potter was an awesome show; the best one, in my opinion, other than the first one. I liked that although it dealt with some very heavy subjects, there was still a lot of humor. I had read some reviews that were knocking it because the audience was expected to know who all of the characters were and that the movie didn't do enough to bring in new fans. But really, if they had, it would have been a 5 hr movie! Be realistic people... with a book that big, things will have to be assumed and parts are going to be cut. There was really only one scene from the book that I really missed in the movie and that was Dumbledore's funeral. The end of this movie could have been a real tear jerker if there was some effort put into it.

The next morning J and I went for a walk with the dog down to a local hippie coffee shop, and then to the park to sip our cappuccino and eat muffins. It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining, and it wasn't too hot or too cold. The dog was behaving, even catching the Frisbee a few times AND BRINGING IT BACK occasionally. We made our way back to the house past the beautiful gardens and huge houses that surround our little townhouse complex, and I was reminded of how much I love our neighbourhood.

Soon we had to get going to my Aunts house for my final (finally) bridal shower. On our way I had to stop quickly at the mall to find a sweater to wear over my dress because I am always cold. Do you have any idea how difficult it was to find a white cardigan sweater in July?? We had to go to 4 stores and were 'fashionably' late to the shower. Oh well, the party doesn't really start until the bride gets there anyway right?

I have been looking forward to this shower most of all. The others were wonderful, but there is just something about sitting in a room surrounded by people who have known you your entire life. These people all remember 'little girl' me and are now getting to be a part of 'grown up' me. There was even a surprise guest; J's Nanny was able to come down! I have only seen her at funerals lately, and other than that and J's practice wedding, I haven't seen her since I was about 8. She still remembers me as the little girl who got chased by their golden retriever. That was so nice, I'm happy that she came.

I was also happy that my own grandmother was able to make it down. When I had talked to her last she wasn't sure she was going to make it. She doesn't like to sleep at either my mom's or my aunts house, so she was planning to drive down and back to her house, that's 2 hrs there and 2 hrs back. We were all impressed with how well she behaved. My Grandma likes to be the center of attention. I'm not sure if it's a form of dementia or the start of Alzheimer's or something, or if she has always been like this and I'm just becoming more aware of it as I grow up, but when the focus of conversation is not on her, or on a topic that she choose, she can't stand it. At one point near the end she did go and sit outside.

After the party, one of my other aunts went over to my moms house and us girls, my mom, my aunt, my sister and I, sat around and chatted for hours. We ordered Swiss Chalet for dinner and I didn't get home until 11pm. So tired.

Amazing day. Amazing weekend. Thank you.

Better than Christmas!

Today marks the start of an incredible 3 day wonderful, fantastic time! First today. As I write this, someone is cleaning my house! Since D has got so sick it has been incredibly hard to keep up with the housekeeping. Whenever I tried to clean, he would get upset that I was doing all of the work. He would try and help only to have to stop after an hour of cleaning. He would want me to take a break with him so that he wouldn't feel guilty. So since our entire house takes more than an hour to clean, only parts of it were getting looked after. So my mom came to the rescue! She has sent us her cleaning lady for the summer to help us out. For which, I am eternally grateful. As if my mom doesn't do enough for everyone, just one more thing to add to the list of why my mom is the best in the world.

Then tomorrow! Harry Potter Day!!! My bestest friend, J, and my bestest sister, H, and by bestest fiancee, D, are all going to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. I have had this day mapped out for weeks. How J is getting our house, who is standing in line, I even bought the tickets last week. Tonight I am going out to buy special themed movie snacks, that's how excited I am for this movie. I am very happy that this has been something that has brought my sister and I closer together. HP is something we have bonded over. We have gone to see every movie together within the opening week, it has been great.

And After Harry Potter? How can it get any better?? Why another shower of course! This time it is with my family. I will know everyone, there will be some people there that I haven't seen in a long time. There will even be people there that I have seen recently, but only in unfortunate circumstances, it will be so nice to have a happy occasion to share with them. It is going to be so much fun, I can't wait!

It's all a blur...

Ever flown somewhere just for the day? I'm not talking about flying in the night before, having a day at your destination, and flying back. No. I mean fly in and out in the same day. Most sane people probably wouldn't attempt to do this, not unless your destination was somewhere like Timmons ON, where there would be a high likelihood that you could see most of it in one day. But what about someplace like New York City? Okay, so aparently my family is insane, because that is what we did this weekend. My parents, my sister and her finacee and I flew to NYC at 8 am and flew home at 8 pm (well 10 pm because the flight was delayed). Are we crazy??

Crazy or not, it was a lot of fun and extremely tiring. The day started very early. Up at 5 am to be out the door at 6:15 am to be at the airport to catch the flight at 8:30 am. We landed in NYC just before 10 and by the time we got off the plane, checked in for the flight home and made our way to Grand Central Terminal, it was nearly 11 am.

From there we split up, the boys went to the MET while the girls went shopping to find mom a dress to wear to my wedding in Sept. The shopping leg of our trip was a bust! First we went to Filene's basement, thinking they would have designer dresses on the cheap. However, they had NO dresses! None at all! That was a huge disappointment. From there we went to TJ Maxx which was just upstairs, and they didn't have much either. We decided to head up to Macy's. On the way there we stopped in at the Burlington Coat Factory. Mom tried on a few things, but nothing worked.

Then we saw a David's Bridal and thought we'd check that out. We did not expect to not be able to wander the store and just see what was around. You had to be escorted around by a consultant. So annoying! And since we are polite Canadians mom tried on a bunch of dresses even though she didn't like any of them. By this time it was getting close to lunch so we used that as an excuse to leave the store, finally! But we did not have enough time to still go to Macy's and meet the boys for lunch at the Empire State Building.

Lunch was at Sbarro's at the base of the Empire State Building. Basically, it is a pizza joint with a salad bar. We all had a slice of pizza that wasn't very good, in fact, it was only luke warm. So far the day wasn't turning out as we had hoped.

After lunch we took a cab down to Battery Park to catch the ferry to take us to Liberty isl and Ellis isl. The ferry was fun, we had a great spot to see everything, and even though dad lost his sunglasses overboard, it was probably the best part of the day.

Dad with sunglasses.... and without!

Our first stop, Liberty Isl. On the island we each got an audio tour. The amout of American patriotic propaganda on the audio tour would have been funny if it weren't so annoying. It was like they were tryng ot make you weep with American pride or something, but if you aren't american, it does nothing. I ended up skipping most of it, and as a result, I skipped the only part that I would have found interesting... the architecture and engineering of her.
Just as we stepped back on the boat to head over to Ellis Isl. there was a sudden downpour. We were happy that we decided to stay inside near the door instead of out on the deck like we had on the way over. Because of the rain and becuase that audio tour took so long, we decided not to get off the ferry at Ellis Isl. Instead we just saw it from the boat. When we got back to the main land we walked up to Ground Zero to have a look.

Then tried the NYC Subway system to get up to Times Square.

We spend a whole 10 min in Times Square before it was time to head back over to Grand Central Terminal to catch the bus back to the airport and head home.

High Tea

A couple of weeks ago, I had my first bridal shower. it was a wonderful tea party hosted by D's aunts complete with little finger sandwiches and big hats. I have been meaning to write this post for a while, but life has got in the way too many times.

For me, the shower was a weekend long event because my bestest friend J came to visit all weekend! The festivities started on Friday when I picked her up at the train station and we went shopping for our weekend project, a bird mobile. We headed over to Len's Mill Store and bought a bunch of retro cool fabrics to create our little birdies. Once home we ordered pizza, watched movies, and started sewing.

Saturday morning we went to the Farmers Market with my friend T and ate dumplings for breakfast and enjoyed the hustle and bustle and sunshine of a local Farmers Market. In addition to our bird mobile, we had another mission we had to complete before the shower. We needed a hat, because who has a hat fit for a fancy tea party hanging around any more??

Value Village was our first stop to try and find cheap big fancy hats. They had nothing. But they did have the Fisher Price Roller Skates that J and I used to have as kids, and believe it or not, I could still get my feet in them! It was, albeit, very tight and once my feet got too sore from skating around the store, we headed for Wal-Mart where I had previously seen hats for under $10. Sure enough, we found a couple of big floppy hats that were on budget - Mission accomplished! Back home to make more birds!

Sunday was the shower, it was so nice to be surrounded by the people closest to me and my new family and to be welcomed in so warmly. The food that one of the aunts prepared with her neighbour (a complete stranger to me) was fantastic! And there was sooo much of it with so may choices. I didn't get to try one of everything, but I'm sure all of it was just as wonderful as what I did try.

There were fun games and prizes, and the gifts that I received were wonderful. I have already put most of them to use, however, the lingerie will have to wait until after the wedding right??

When I got home from the shower, I pulled up to the house and called in for D to help me unload the car. No Answer. I could hear the TV on in the bedroom which meant that he was watching it from in bed instead of on the couch. Generally, that's an indication that he is not feeling well or is in pain. So, since the car was parked on the street, I unloaded it before going up to check on him. When I got upstairs, he was indeed in a lot of pain.

I have to say that the best gift of the day was not wrapped in paper, and it did not have a bow. It was a hand made card from D's cousin's daughter.

Weddings are when a

princess falls in love with

a prince and gets married

Everybody is happy to

see you get married.

True loves forever.

Have a good wedding.

The true gift of that card was when I showed it to D, and through all of the pain, he smiled and said it made his day.

Long Weekend Projects

Back to work after a lovely long weekend. It came early this year, which I don't like because of the higher probability of cold weather. Saturday ended up raining a bit so it was a good thing we tackled our first project that day and stayed indoors cleaning the house. D's mom and some of her girlfriends were passing through town and had not seen the house, so they were going to be stopping by. Our house has not been this sparkling since we moved in! And it stayed clean for about a whole 24 hrs.

Sunday we started our biggest project of the weekend, new lighting for the kitchen and bathrooms! We have been waiting for a tax refund to be able to buy the lights and that, after a year, finally came in last week so we went shopping! The first store we tried to go to was closed, and the second one was too expensive but we found all 5 light fixtures we needed at Canadian Tire of all places. A couple were even on sale! We managed to get the first one installed before my parents came over for dinner that night (we thought we'd take advantage of the clean house and have everyone in). We almost installed 2 more on Monday but realized that we need a ceiling hook to complete the light over the kitchen table, so that will have to wait. for now, it is hanging so low that it is almost hiting the back of the chair. I'm not sure when we will be able to get to the bathroom vanity lights. Hopefully soon.

The last project this weekend was kind of impromtu. I went to the garden center with my neighbour T, just to have a look, and found some wonderful purple and white flowers. I planted them in some urns in the front of our house.

Wedding Dress

It just occurred to me that I started this blog well after I bought my wedding dress, and never shared the story with you all yet.

I knew exactly the dress I wanted. Well, not exactly, I could see it in my head but had yet to find it in any bridal magazine or on any website.  So when D's mom told me that this big Toronto bridal boutique was having their annual sale I was convinced, convinced, that I would not find it there either.  It was still early January, D had proposed less than a month ago, I still had not set a date, and my maid of honour was in the hospital... but a sale on bridal gowns was just too tempting to pass up because, well - you never know! 

The sale was on for four days and I went on the last day.  There also happened to be a small snow storm that day, but hey, we live in Canada... what else would you expect??  My mom came with me, just the two of us.  It was so nice to be with her, to talk to each other and be completely open and honest about things that we just can't be open about with other people.  But I digress...

When we arrived, both mom and I decided that we did not want to pay the $2 to check our coats, we probably weren't going to be there long and we are always cold anyway.  So in we went with no expectations so there would not be any disappointment.  When we entered the showroom we were both pleasantly surprised how uncrowded it was.  I had always pictured the Friends episode where they go the the sale and have to wrestle other women to get the dress they want. 

Working on a budget, we headed straight to the $199.00 rack.  I was hoping that maybe the reason I could not find my dream dress was because it was now a few years out of style.  But it was not there.  At that point I was prepared to say "OK, we didn't find a steal here. Time to go."  But mom convinced me to keep looking through the rest of the dresses.  

"We're here already, there's no sales pressure, so we might as well just have some fun and try on dresses."

"O.K."

We first went through the size 10 rack (keep in mind that bridal gown sizing is crazy) and pulled out 4 dresses to try on.  None of them were what I saw in my mind of what I would wear on my wedding day, but they were all beautiful.  There were dressing rooms set up all around the outside of the big ballroom/showroom made out of tent poles and blue drapes.  We chose the one with no light (oops!).  I tried on all four dresses and as I was trying on the second one, mom remembered to take some pictures for my sister.  No I will not be posting them anywhere.  

I decided two of them were worth holding on to even though they were all a little big and we headed back to the racks in search of more.  This time we went through the size 8 rack.  Here we found a whole bunch of dresses I liked.  Mom was carrying 4 or 5, and I had 4 or 5 and we were heading back to the change room to try them on when I saw it.  The bottom of the dress sticking out between two others.  With my last free hand I grabbed the dress without even looking at the top of the dress or the price and knew it was the one.  When we got back to the dressing room mom could tell by the stupid grin on my face that I had found it.  I tried it on first, and it fit perfectly!  Mom looked around the little change room at the 10 other dresses that were hung haphazardly along with our winter coats, purses and snow boots. 

"Do you even want to try any of these other ones on?"

"No"

But this was not how this was supposed to go!  I wasn't supposed to find the perfect dress today!  I was supposed to go dress shopping with my sister and bridesmaid and my cousin said she wanted to go too.  How was I going to tell them that I had gone without them and found a dress on my own?  This was altogether too complicated because it just wasn't supposed to be this easy.  Too easy... there must be something wrong.  I need to think about this.  We asked if they could hold the dress while we went to go and get coffee to think it over.  They said they could not hold the dress if we left.  Shit!  OK, so we won't leave.  We put the dress back in the little change room with our coats and a few other dresses to make it look like we were coming back any second to try on more and we took our purses and went to think.  

Since we didn't have our coats we didn't actually leave the showroom, instead, we wandered through the accessories and bridesmaids dresses and talked about how this was just too easy.  What if I left it and then never found another one like it?  I would kick my self.  This dress is at the top end of my budget (still within budget), but what if I get it, and find one just like it for much cheaper? I would kick my self.  This was a big decision.  I have never spend that much on clothing, let alone one piece of clothing that I was going to wear once! After an hour of wandering, I finally decided to get the dress.  

First big decision down,  a million more to go!  

It's Official

We have officially changed the date of our wedding.  I'm not as panicky as I was last week.  Everything except the dress has worked out, and I'm sure that if the bridal store won't do the alterations, I will be able to find a custom dress maker to do it.  And I bet I could find one closer to home, the bridal store is over an hour away.  I have found a photographer that we are going to meet with this weekend, and they are the same price as the last one I found, but I think their photographs are better.  Also, for the same price, I get two photographers!  So they will be able to capture many more candid moments than any other photographer that we could afford.  I am really looking forward to meeting with them on Saturday.  I guess the next big thing we need to worry about is setting up our registry.  I'm thinking Sears and maybe the Bay.