Are you there blog? It's me, Erin...

Dear Blog,

I know you have been feeling a little neglected lately. I have been off in my own world working hard at my job and not giving you the attention you deserve. The truth is, I have been quite reclusive from everything and everyone since the wedding. However, there has been a lot going on that I should probably write about because I always feel better when I get it out there and it's not all bottled up inside (which is my usual m.o. for dealing with shit).

1. The Wedding.

Only one word can sum it up... awesome! I had an absolute blast! There were a few hiccups through out the day, but I think I handled them well and I hope I wasn't anything that resembled a Bridezilla.

2. D's Health.

I started a post a little while back but was afraid to put it out to the world in case I jinxed his wonderful improvement. That's right, I think I might just about have back the man I fell in love with. While he only ended up being about 80% better at the time of the wedding, he is at about 95% now! There are still things that he will never be able to eat again, like onions, but his appetite and energy are finally back! He has stopped losing weight, and even gained some. At his 2nd Remicade infusion, he weighed 0.5lbs more than the first one; at the 3rd, he weighed even more. He goes for his 4th in a month and I hope that he is back up to his normal weight.

3. My Sister's Health.

She is sick. Very. Sick. She had her colon removed on Friday as a last resort attempt to get her life back. Unfortunately that means a good 6 weeks of recovery from this surgery, 6 months of living with a stoma and colostomy bag, and finally a 2nd surgery to create an internal bag and remove the stoma.

On Friday I stayed at work as long as I could but I wanted to be at the hospital when the surgeon came to speak to my parents. The surgery was scheduled for 9:30am, H went in at about 10:15 (I think); the surgery was to last approx. 4 hrs. When I showed up at 3 we still had not heard anything. The Dr. finally came out at 5pm, some 8 hrs later, and told us that they had to make the incision a little bigger than they had wanted, but the surgery went well and she was in recovery.

According to H recovery was bad, and since my mom wasn't back there to help, it just made it worse. When she woke up she said that she could hear them talking about a bigger incision and she threw up and started crying. It took a couple minutes, but when one of the nurses heard her crying they came back and talked to her and calmed her down. It must have been so scary for her to be back there without her family.

As they brought her to her room, one of the nurses came and got us from the waiting room and we all went up together. She seemed to be in good spirits for just coming out of surgery. She even managed to crack a joke about Dr.'s taking her ass away. That night was relatively uneventful because she was still on the epidural and therefore numb and pain free.

The next day, Saturday, they got her up and out of bed and sitting in a chair for a bit. When she went back to bed, she must have hit the epidural line, because she started to feel pain. A. Lot. Of. Pain. Since they hadn't planned to stop the epidural, they hadn't yet given her any other pain meds yet. From there, it seems to have spiraled downward. She was nauseous, in pain had a distended belly; they were even concerned that they would have to go back in at one point. Instead, they put a tube into her stomach and pumped out the excess bile. That seems to have helped out with the distention. They gave her morphine for the pain and some anti-nausea medication because they don't want her to throw up (that could cause damage to the stitches). Needless to say Saturday night was bad. My dad was with her until 2 am, and her fiancee stayed the night.

I don't have a whole lot of information about what happened after that. All I know is that they had her walking about 30 or 40 feet. I haven't had an update since.

4. Baby Fever.

It's back and stronger than ever. I found a new (to me) blog yesterday called "Baby Rabies; when it's more than a fever". So true. D and I have talked about it a bit since the wedding and I totally understand where he is coming from; now is not a logical time to start to try to have a baby. But there is nothing logical about wanting a baby! I mean really, when you think about, what is logical about wanting to do that to your self??? Hey I know, lets do something that will make me sick 24/7 for at least 3 months!! and I won't even be able to take anything for it" Ya, that sounds logical! And then, I can get really fat and uncomfortable for 6 months after that with symptoms that range from sausage toes to night sweats, from cramps to contraction, and totally stretch and permanently disfigure my body. Totally "logical". And the cherry on the top of this oh-so-appetizing-sundae? You guessed it! The worst pain anyone can ever feel in their life as a baby literally rips you apart as it enters the world that lasts for hours upon hours. Logical?? My ASS!


So that has been my last month in a nut shell. How have you been?

All my love,
Erin