Unanswered

Why?

Why her?

Why him?

Why us?

Why now?

These are questions I ask my self daily. I suppose that this is where religion comes in for those who believe in God. Because it's a test, He has a plan for her, for him, for you, because He knows that you can handle it and come out on the other side a better stronger person because of it. It's times like this that I wish I wasn't so skeptical, that I could blindly accept a higher power, and believe that there was some method to this madness. But I can't. So I am left to wonder why, why her, why him, why us, why now?

Since January when my sister was released from hospital, she hasn't been getting any better and just maintaining the status quo. In the last 2 weeks however, she has gotten worse. She has had increased and bloody bathroom visits. Yesterday she saw her specialist, lets call her Dr. Poop. Dr. Poop has been her specialist since 2007 when she first went to McMaster. The last time she was in hospital, she wasn't responding to the prednisone, the salofalk, and now imuran and remicade. They have tried everything and are now out of options. The only thing left is surgery.

The good news is that surgery is the only known cure for Ulcerative Colitis (UC) and as such, we hope that this will be the cure she needs. The bad news is that it is major surgery which will remove her colon, a pretty useful organ. Yes people live without colons, and hopefully this will improve her quality of life, but there are major risk factors and still a lot of unknowns.

When diagnosed with UC, she was told that it was 'most likely' Colitis and not Crohn's Disease (CD). They couldn't be 100% sure because while the inflammation was restricted to her colon, indicative of UC, she also had other symptoms that are indicative of CD. So she was officially diagnosed with Crohn's Colitis. What does this mean? I don't know. I am worried that it means that she is at higher risk of having problems even after the surgery 'cure' like pouchitis, or that it will turn out to be CD and the inflammation will occur somewhere else.

A Colectomy is a two stage surgery. First, they remove the colon, and create a stoma on the abdomen where a colostomy bag will attach. She will have this bag for 3 months while her body adjusts and begins to heal. The second surgery will be to create an internal 'bag' or J-pouch so that she will not have to have the external colostomy bag for the rest of her life. This J-pouch is created out of her healthy small intestine. Pouchitis, as I mention earlier, is similar to UC except that it occurs in people who have had a colectomy, in their J-pouch. There is no cure for pouchitis.

I hope this is it. I hope this is the end.

It will still be a while before she can have the surgery, because she has to have a bunch of tests done and another scopy. Mom said it likely won't happen until after the wedding in September or October, then she will have a bag for 3 months before she can have the second surgery to create the J-pouch. That won't likely happen until the new year so that she is not in hospital or trying to recover from surgery over the holidays. This means that she will miss another 2 semesters of school as she will not be able to return until May of 2010, according to Dr. Poop.

I have no idea what this will do to her wedding plans. They set the date for August 2010 because they assumed that she would be done school at that point, now she won't be done until 2011. Also, if she is out of school, my parents don't know what do to about insurance since she will no longer be a student and therefore covered under my parents. crap. So again I ask...

Why?

Why her?

Why him?

Why us?

Why now?